Today I found my copy of my Patriarchal Blessing on my shelf; and I had thought it had been lost when mom switched the rooms around over the summer. Tonight I decided to go through it again, though I already thought I remembered what it said. It has been months since I've read it.
Tonight as I looked over the talents, promises, and prophecies God has given to me personally, I couldn't help but feel a comfort I haven't felt in a very long time. I feel like I've forgotten who I really am. I feel like my life focus now is to totally change myself into a totally different person than I once was; to grow up, to man up, to get tough, to become independent, to get what I really want. But I feel like I've been trying to do so in a way that is unpleasing to the Lord. As I look over my blessing, I realize that I've been playing this whole game of life with a disorganized, weak, uncontrolled, unplanned strategy. I've been thrown new trials this year unlike anything I have ever faced before, and I allowed them to let my grip on the iron rod grow weaker.
My Patriarchal Blessing showed up at a perfect time; I just wish I had been reading it all along. It's my personal guide, my own instructions from my Father in heaven. Now, I recommit myself to centering my life on God and working on what he has instructed me to do; no more time wasting, arrogant, impatient, lazy, disrespectful, darkness in my life!
I'm beginning to find my purpose again.
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